When a Loved One with Dementia No Longer Recognizes You

Apart from having to watch a loved one go through the devastating stages of Alzheimer’s or another dementia disease, the next saddest thing may be when the person stops recognizing you. This can bring up all sorts of feelings, of which some while not fair, are there nonetheless.  When we take time to visit a family member (in person or via video call) in a memory care community and they don’t even know who we are, some people wonder why they are making the effort.  

However, a long-term caregiver reminds us how we can be certain the person is not reacting to our presence in some way?  Maybe the sound of our voice, or the touch of our hand?   In the same way people in comas have said they heard the voices of loved ones even when they were unable to communicate, perhaps a person in the later stages of Alzheimer’s disease knows we are there for them on some level.  At the very least, in whatever way they can understand, we want them to know they are loved and valued.    

Experts suggest a way to help make yourself more recognizable to your parents or spouse.  If you are an adult child, try putting together a photo timeline of you as a small child, an adolescent, a young adult to a current picture.  Spouses can do the same starting with a picture from their early days as a couple to the present.  

For anyone having difficulty being around a loved one with Alzheimer’s, it may be helpful to learn all you can about the disease so you understand what is going on.  It will also teach you better ways to more effectively communicate with the person.  

At MorningStar of Arvada, our goal is to offer the best senior living in the area, which includes compassionate and loving care to those suffering from Alzheimer’s and other dementia-related diseases.  Our approach is holistic and encompasses every aspect of the disease as well as individualized care.  For trusted memory care Arvada, CO families can count on, please contact us or visit our website for more information.

MorningStar of Arvada’s mission statement “to honor, to serve, to invest” sets us apart from other senior living options. We have built a foundation on honoring God, valuing our seniors and selecting staff with a felt calling to serve. Set in a warm, loving atmosphere with beautiful surroundings and resort-style amenities, we provide residents exceptional independent living, assisted living and memory care.